so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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