I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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