Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
They have beer where we have blood.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
