so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
