they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
