He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
