We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I love you. Go after that dick
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
