my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
