i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
