If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
