3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Randomize