Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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