SEEEEXXX PLEASE
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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