my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
We have started to decorate penises.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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