It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize