I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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