she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
