4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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