I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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