Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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