You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Randomize
