I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What drink are we having for lunch?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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