I wanna passion pit in your ass
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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