God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
