So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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