when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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