I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire