Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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