Do you still have your period?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
