You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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