I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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