I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
