dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
