Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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