Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
