i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize