My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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