break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
