Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
