Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
