Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
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