He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize
