his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Boobs speak an international language.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
