I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
