its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
