so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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