he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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