kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
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