I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
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I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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