You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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