I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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